Getting a Second Chance After Making a Bad First Impression
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Tips on making amends and successful first interactions
I consider myself a friendly person who gets along with people. I am pretty intuitive as well, I can read people like a book. However, I’m also admittedly a stubborn person. If someone really rubs me the wrong way, I have a hard time forgetting that first meeting. Chances are, it probably made my skin crawl. Since I am an empath, I find unpleasant interactions very disturbing. However, I believe in giving second chances. Especially if the person is willing to redeem themselves and take responsibility for their behavior.
Studies show that we make snap judgments about other people. 80% of first impressions are based on two subconscious questions: Can I trust this person? Is this person capable?^1
When you meet someone for the first time, you are both analyzing each other. We are observing each other’s behavior to see if there is mutual respect. We are noticing their appearance, the way they listen, and especially how they respond in conversation. Essentially, we are trying to figure out if this person is someone we want to be around again. On average, this process takes about twenty-seven seconds!²
Personally, first impressions are all about the “vibes” I get from someone. That’s my intuition as an empathetic person. If someone has a “negative energy” or is very abrasive, it makes me see red flags everywhere! I have met people and could tell they had a lot of pain inside them. Some people are distrustful of others and wear this on their sleeve. Intuition is a powerful thing and we all have it innately.
I met someone a few years ago who I knew would be in my life for a long time. This person was loud, obnoxious, and very unfriendly during this interaction. Although years later, we have managed to make our situation work, I still find myself recognizing these traits in her. I hope one day that my opinion will change but it’s going to take some work on her part. I have opened myself up to the idea of…